Screen time reflection
My husband and I try to be mindful about screen time with our little one. For the first 3,5 years of her life, she and I were constantly together. In that time, I occasionally let her watch some animal videos or Peter Rabbit. But she was not really interested yet.
When she was 3,5 years old, we send her to kindergarten three days a week, for 3,5 hours.
In that time, I was in burnout, so I needed those hours to recover. But with these hours, my need for recovery went up, and I needed more hours.
When she was 2 years old, I started to incorporate a quiet time in the afternoon. In this time she could sleep, or play in her own room, while I could also recover. I build this time up; starting with 15 min, to 30 and when she was 3 years old she could play independently for 2 hours. I would have to help her every now and then to start new activities, but at that time that was what she needed from me.
But when she was 3,5 years old, my burnout recovery could finally start. As I said, I noticed the 3,5 hours in the morning were not enough for me, as I regularly was so overwhelmed and exhausted that I lost ability to function in daily life. My husband took care of me, our little one and the house. But it wasn’t easy. So, in that time, we started to put on the screen. It started with 1 hour, but on really bad days, it would be 2 hours. We felt bad about it, but for that time it was a necessity.
Now, around 2 years later, I still regularly lose ability to function, we now know that’s because of autism and adhd, and maybe also something physical (the doctor doesn’t know yet and it’s still in research..) But, in these past years we have gotten help. Two days a week someone comes at our house to help me with daily tasks, and my routine. And I now have a good friend in our village, who is the mother of the best friend of our little one, who helps around also.
Lately, little one started to ask if and when she could watch something, and we have seen some meltdowns happening when screen time was over. Both me and husband agreed it is time to do things differently with the screen time.
We have explained her that we won’t be watching every day anymore, and that she will hear from us when she may watch; we want her to be immersed in her play and not think about screen time. We ourselves are also detoxing from our screens, so that she sees that we do this as a family.
We started this almost 2 weeks ago, and it is going really well. She is playing happily all day, and we are reading more books together, coloring and walking around the village. Just doing stuff together.
I myself also notice more peace, and in the evening I’m really feeling tired. It’s not difficult to just go to bed. Last night I watched a show before bed and noticed that the tiredness was more difficult to feel. I was inclined to keep watching, but I intercepted myself and went to bed on the regular time.
We hope to grow as a family and do fun things together, that we can say in the future ‘we really had good times together and made fun memories’.